Top 5 Awesome Things About Bionic Woman, Episode 5

5. Cock block by Isaiah Washington. A few days ago, I complained about Washington sinking my boner for the show by his insistence on showing up for work. But last night he finally had one short scene that was worth something. Just as Jaime was getting gently kissed mauled by that one dude, and I was shielding my eyes and saying out loud to myself, "Lucky bastard," Washington shows up out of effin' nowhere to cock block the shit out of ol' dude. It doesn't exactly make up for years of being an asshole, or minutes of stinkin' up the screen on Grey's, but I gotta give credit where credit's due. Hopefully next time, the questioning lesbian chick with the short hair will be sent in instead. You hear me, NBC?

4. Michelle Ryan's British...and um...wait, what was I saying? Yeah, so in this episode, she was able to flaunt her sexiness even more by unleashing that accent on the show. She was "pretending" to be an English exchange student for an assignment. What the writers are lacking in plot lines and logic in this show, they're making up for in bogus reasons to flash the stash. Hey, whatever excuse you guys have to use in the future, I don't care what you're sellin, I'm buyin!

3. Pretend-English-exchange-student Jaime digs Rilo Kiley. My ears perked up when, during a dorm room scene, I hear the illustrious vocals of a Ms. Jenny Lewis. Just a few minutes later, Ani Difranco's all up in ma 'er? Cheers to the music supervisor. Let's do lunch! Oh and uh, by the bi, chick playin' Jaime's roommate = luckiest bitch on earth right now.

2.

I do believe this is the first episode where they didn't get the Bionic Woman wet. But I can't say she returned the favor. Ahem. *Austin Powers head tilt* *raised eyebrow*

1. No seriously, the English accent is effin' hot. I don't know how I can make this any clearer: I *heart* English accents. She has one. We heard LOTS of it in this episode. Katharine Mcphee and I are sawin' wood* as we speak to add an extension on our bed for Michelle Ryan. This is serious business.

*As of right now, "sawin' wood" is officially code for *Mcphee and I doin' it*. Hee...I said, "wood."

When Life Hands You Lemons...

...Watch old Katharine Mcphee interviews.

Yes folks, today's post is a selfish one. I'm dedicating it to things that are helping me feel better about having my myspace page deleted all of a sudden, with no explanation. *sigh*

UPDATE: My myspace profile has been restored! Such a strange, strange day/week. But I'm super grateful...You can add me by clicking on the tab at the top of the site

Those things are:

1. Mcphee, eatin' fruit (it aint the only fruit she's been eatin) and doin' freestyle Amy Winehouse. Nothin' better than that on a dreary day:


2. You guys:-)

Yep, listening to just a few of the calls some of you have made (in the upper right-hand corner of my site) to my snapvine BOX...really heals the soul:-)

3. ...so does Liz Hurley in a maid's outfit...talking all British, and shit:


4. A Pimp Named Slickback. All Day. E'ryday:

(from "Boondocks" tv show)

Just a random thought...

That Isaiah Washington is really sinkin' my boner for Bionic Woman. Everytime that chick gets stays all hot and sweaty and is kicking ass, I gotta have Isaiah's homophobic ass show up on my screen. And what makes it worse?? He has speaking lines! I don't need to hear that condescending tone. Damn it.

So they better have that Bionic Woman and that blonde crazy chick either DO IT hard really frickin' soon, or at least make out in the rain in a dream sequence, or like, get that Jennifer Garner to guest star and make out with both of them after some ass kicking, or I'm packing up my balls and my squirt gun and I'm going home!

Nah.

Thank you, I now return you to our regularly scheduled program.

"Your Daily Lesbian"...is back!

Oh my sweets, you guys really know how to get a point across. A few days ago, I asked in this post if I should bring back the Daily Lesbian part of my site where I feature a different chick each day who's looking for new friends, penpals or a LOVE SLAVE. You guys sent in a resounding um...'yes please.' And so here we are. I'm gonna do this for as long as I can. We had some great success earlier this year with it. I live to get you laid.

I'm going to use myself as an example, because I fit the criteria. I am a lesbian on a daily basis. I am a girl. I want to date another girl. I am single. Here I go:

Name: Arlan
Age: 26
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Myspace URL: www.myspace.com/thisismyinterlude


"I currently reside in Los Angeles. I enjoy imagining what fly-fishing is like, making faces in the mirror when no one is home, and teaching inmates how to make poetic licenses. I turn 27 in a few days, so you might wanna jump on the good foot with me while I can still walk upright without the use of cane. According to my OKCupid profile, I'm 'rad.' So it must be true!

It's true, I do know a ton of lesbians from all over the world. It's true, I do receive hundreds of messages from said lesbians showing me pictures of their naughty bits and offering sexual favors in exchange for just about anything. But believe me when I tell you, that is not enough! I am honestly and sincerely looking to date. I don't have a significant other and I would love to have one (or 5?). I was in one long-term relationship after another since I was 16, and now I've been single for nearly 2 years.

I like having fun, ladies. So if you wanna come over to my house and watch General Hospital with me while we eat grapes and giggle, bring that shit on! IF you'd prefer to take me to Eleven, get me drunk and have your way with me, um...who's complainin? Ultimately though, I think I'll meet my *girlfriend* online or at Barnes & Noble in the magazine section. I'm looking for someone who's in the 24-30 range. I'm 5'8" ish, so I generally like women who are 5'5" or taller. If you are British or can put on an amazing British accent for hours at a time, come find me:-) If you have a good sense of humor, lots of ambition, a nice rack w/ sensitive nipples, and enjoy talking about absolutely nothing sometimes, apply within!"

serious in-queer-ies only, contact...ya know...me @ www.myspace.com/thisismyinterlude


want to be featured? here's how it works: if you're looking for a new lova, friend, date, etc, send an email to me at interludemagazine@yahoo.com with the following: your name, your age, location, MYSPACE PROFILE URL (or whichever way you want people to contact you) what you're looking for, a few words about yourself, AND send me a LINK to your picture. upload your picture to myspace or photobucket or something and send me the ADDRESS to the pic. please dont send me files! just the address. i can do the rest. and then check back to see if you're featured. lots of ladies will see your beautiful face and read your beautiful words, and maybe you'll make some new friends! woohoo! oh! and if you want to film a vid (2 mins or less) of you talking about yourself or showing us around or whatever, i'll definitely post that too! just send me the link to where i can find the vid on youtube or myspace.

Bi-onic Woman? Come on you guys, just for me...

(Mcphee and I are getting a new roommate, y'all.)

Ladies and ladies, I had a post all typed out about the new "Bionic Woman" show and the hot training and fight scenes, and about how they should totally make the chick bisexual since she's hot and lives in San Fran on the show. I was ready to press "publish," when something...came up?

What I am about to say is not easy for me. Mostly because I'm so turned on right now I could probably singlehandedly keep the entire city of San Francisco lit up for hours. I have been watching the show, and digging it. There was wet chick fighting. There were one-handed pull ups. But until this very hour, I had no idea...that...

Michelle Ryan is BRITISH. *tear*

No seriously, look:


*Swooooon*

Ok, ok so you're saying that I'm WAAAY behind the times here right since this chick was once on East Enders (snoggin a chick, no less) but I didn't know!

If you're not watching "Bionic Woman," here's a good reason to start:


If you're still not convinced, you obviously have not seen this yet:


I've been on the horn with Mcphee's voicemail for a few minutes trying to convince it to let me allow Michelle to sleep on my side of the bed this time. K's voicemail is a bit selfish though...so we'll see who wins. I've got spunk and tenacity...this could go my way.

P.S. This is an interesting little clip I found online from nearly 4 years ago:

"Eastenders beauty Michelle Ryan has admitted she has sex to relax, but her recent lesbian snog on the British soap was all hard work. Michelle Zoe Slater in the show set pulses racing when she kissed screen pal Kelly Taylor, played by Brooke Kinsella. But the 19-year-old said: ''It really wasn't a big deal to me. 'It's just work and you just get on with it, so it was exactly like kissing any other character.'' She also said making love helps her wind down after a hard day. ''How do I relax? Oh you know... sex. I love having sex, it's the best thing ever!''"

Amen, Michelle from 4 years ago. Amen.

P.P.S. HOLY MOTHER OF CRISPY CREAM DONUTS AND ALL THAT IS HOLY!<--click *whew*...

Thin Ice. Phat Moves.

You guys all know how I love to perform interpretive dance, right? Well I've secretly always wanted to bring that form of expression to the thin, cold ice. I find the prospect riveting. Much like this British movie...


(Thin Ice 1995)

As if ice skating wasn't gay enough already...

That reminds me. If you are British and hot and between the ages of 23-32, and you wanna get up on me, holler at your girl, alright? You think I'm kidding. Those closest to me know I couldn't be more serious if I tried.

*British sigh*

L Word Season 5 Promo...homos...

Genevieve from Ireland knows how to stroke the collective lesbian g-spot...thanks for sending this in:-)



I know we still have 3 months (in the U.S.) to wait...but let me publicly state for the record that I will be watching Season 5 for the sole purpose of seeing Helena in prison. I will enjoy Alice in every scene she's in. I will watch Jenny do the chick who's playing her in her movie (creepy, but somehow, still hot) and I will ring a chime every time we see nipple this season (cause god knows they owe us), but I will be popping popcorn and pouring strong cocktails for Helena. And I swear to jesus, if they have her pouring out some liquor for her homies, I will go to church on the following Sunday. Because that's heaven sent.

So is Rachel Shelley...

...and most British lesbians...

My favorite lesbian movies...

The number one question I get asked by people on an almost daily basis is "can you recommend some good lesbian movies?" The second most asked question is, "How do lesbians do it?" This post is designed to help answer both questions at the same time.

I've been gay for a good while now...and over the years have seen the good, the bad, and the ugly, when it comes to lesbian film. Grab your girl (or if you're alone, grab your boobs), pop some popcorn, and get started!

After the Top 10, keep reading for the rest of my list!!

(click on any of the titles and/or cover pictures to go to a site to purchase)

1. Boys Don't Cry



Hilary Swank's performance in this changed my life and will probably change yours. Period.

2. When Night is Falling



Beautifully filmed, sensual and subtle performances by the lead actresses. Accents, hot chicks, hot sex scenes, and a well-written story. This is one of the few lesbian movies that got it *right*.

3. Gia



Angelina Jolie went to hell and back while filming this movie, and it shows. One of the best performances by any actor in any movie that I've ever seen. In my opinion, only Hillary Swank in my #1 pick has done a better job in a mostly lesbian-themed movie.

4. Lost & Delirious



Piper Perabo playing "butch" right after "Coyote Ugly" came out? Very brave...very hot...and most importantly, very well-acted! And Jessica Pare' reminds me of Liv Tyler in all her "Empire Records" glory.

5. Kissing Jessica Stein



This one wins my favorite *writing in a lezzy movie* award. It's so smart, and honest and real...funny...I could watch it once a week for the rest of my life.

6. But I'm a Cheerleader



Clea Duvall. That black button-up shirt. That amazing love scene that came out of nowhere. Clea Duvall. 'Nuff said.

7. Fingersmith



Some days I put this at No. 1 simply because of the hotness that is the British lesbian. Look at that video again. I've seen the movie about 5 times, and I'm still a little breathless when I watch that. Seriously. What?? *whew*

8. Aimee & Jaguar



Beautiful and heartbreaking. And you get to bone up on your reading all at the same time. Educational and fun. Just like boobs.

9. The Incredibly True Adventures of Two Girls in Love



Aw...Laurel as a baby dyke. Seriously could not be more adorable. When the movie is good, it's REALLY good.

10. Loving Annabelle



This one's a new addition to my list since it came out just last year. But it's good times. Definitely worth a view or two.

Once you've gone through this list, here are some more favorites to get you through many girl's nights in:-) You can buy most of these titles at Wolfe Video, or rent them at Blockbuster, Netflix, Hollywood video, or your local place...

Foxfire, Better Than Chocolate, It's in the Water, Imagine Me & You, Saving Face, Therese & Isabelle, Floored by Love, If Walls Could Talk 2, D.E.B.S., Tipping the Velvet, Bound, High Art, The Truth About Jane, Fire, Show Me Love, All Over Me, Go Fish, The Sex Monster, Wild Things, Claire of the Moon, Sister My Sister, Chasing Amy.

British InGAYsion

*CLICK HERE TO SEE MY POST TODAY ON AOL'S QUEERSIGHTED...

ABOUT MY FUTURE WIFE AND HER COCK-BLOCKER GIRLFRIEND;-)

I Like Girls... + winners announced!

*CLICK HERE TO SEE MY POST TODAY ON AOL'S QUEERSIGHTED.COM...

ABOUT CHICKS WHO DIG OTHER CHICKS. SURPRISING, I KNOW!

(image from: lovegirls.co.uk)

Axe Girl, Uk, band, music, musicool, british, i like girls, punk

p.s. the winners of yesterday's big anniversary random drawing aaare (click)...

1. this chick
2. this chick
3. and this chick

**if any of these is you, please send me a message on myspace at www.myspace.com/idgogayforangelina to claim your prize:-) thanks to EVERYONE who entered and for all of the fantastic comments yesterday. soooo great to hear from you all!

Purple kisses...

I've been a fan of the Lovegirls site since it first launched a few months ago. It's executed SO well. And it's about British lesbians. I needn't say more, gov'na.

Here are two things that they've recently done to make me love them even more:

1. Their new "Wall of Kisses", where they invite you to send in pictures of you kissing your girlfriend/significant other, and look at other chicks doing the same. Brilliant!

2. Their article about the purple string idea I came up with last December.

Number One With a Bullet

*CLICK HERE FOR MY POST ON AOL'S QUEERSIGHTED!

Bullet, british, uk, u.k., crew, p!nk, pink, get the party started

Out And Proud 'Cross the Pond

Click here to see my post today on AOL's Queersighted.com about a British chick named Natalie and her coming out story...

Johnny and the Mullets!

(www.myspace.com/ilovememorethaniloveyou)

i was told about this band from Essex, UK about a month ago and have been really excited to let you guys know about them. so when i went to their myspace page this morning to listen to their songs again and choose my one or two favs to recommend to you, i found a problem: theyre ALL so fucking good that i can't choose one! so you're gonna have to go check them out and listen to all four. and i have a feeling, it won't be that much of a task for you after hearing just a sampling of one...

when i listen to these girls (yeah thats right, all girl band of 17 & 18 year olds, "some queer, some straight"), i feel sorta British and mega cool. i feel like i'm on the list. and i got the vinyl. and it would be totally fine for me to walk down the street wearing anything these girls are wearing in their pics. its just feel good music...awesome (like...really really awesome) vocals, wicked songwriting and construction...and their myspace page is pitch perfect.

they're having a record release at the end of this month. i wish i could be there, but i do hope they offer a way to buy the album or songs online. might i suggest itunes? i would suggest snocap since it's myspace's official way to sell your music on their site, but i know lots of artists have been having issues with it lately...so i dont wanna send you in the wrong direction.

everyone reading this, stop what youre doin for just a sec and go to www.myspace.com/ilovememorethaniloveyou and set the sucker up to play. i'm currently listening to "baby eyes." but i guarantee you i will be listening to all 4 songs on repeat...most of the day:-)